zubaz wearing man in a cardigan humming song named for his outerwear choice

How’s everyone holding up? Some things I have learned during the past nearly a year of living in a pandemic:

  • Target drive up is the best of the drive up services, and could really only be improved by offering substitution options. That said, they nearly always actually have the items they claim to have so it’s not a huge deal.
  • Wearing a mask outside in the winter is kind of good, actually. Less of a hassle than a scarf.
  • I chew a lot of gum now, because of the masks and some of the food choices I make.

We’ve spent a lot of time at home, of course. They’re building a new water treatment plant and well across the street from us, which has provided some excitement, including but not limited to occasional underground blasting and an accidental skating rink. It also provided a nice backdrop for some Pandemic Portraits when our good friend Betsy Wall stayed with us for a weekend before the second peak. She was in town doing some mini sessions and wondered if we had any portrait needs, and I figured it would be a perfect opportunity to show the world my pandemic attire. Behold:

grown adult male wearing zubaz and a cardigan while standing on railroad tracks

When we shot these I figured it’d be fun to blast them on the socials, but like I said, we hadn’t hit the second spike yet. I didn’t anticipate going back into nearly full lock down for much of the winter. But the spike hit, balancing work and school for Iver and figuring out when the good Hy-Vee Aisles shoppers’ shifts are filled up most of my time.

sorry ladies that’s a wedding ring on my finger

Zoom Thanksgiving and Christmas happened. I think it was during some time off work between Christmas and New Years I remembered that these existed, and I thought maybe it’d be funny to get a bunch of them printed and send them out with Valentines cards to friends and family with absolutely no explanation as to why the recipients were getting a professional photograph of an unshaven Large Adult with a home haircut wearing Zubaz.

that’s a vintage 1991 Twins World Series Champs T-shirt under the cardigan

Catie (rightly) informed me that perhaps that might be a bit over the creepy line, so I did a Facebook thing and now this blog post to announce my intentions and am letting folks consent to receiving such a prize.

So, let me know if you’d like a wallet photograph of myself in the midst of a pandemic. You’ll also get a valentine card, the cheap ones that kids give each other, and some of those come with cool stickers and/or temporary tatoos. I also bought a bunch of gum, so I’m including a stick or two in case you need to wear a mask after eating some tacos, and because gum is flat and can probably go through the mail unlike those little conversation hearts. This year has been challenging and confusing and upsetting for everyone, and I’m hoping you’ll get a chuckle out of these pictures and also I guess the USPS could use some cash, so if you so desire, feel free to write me back with some nonsense you’ve got laying around! Maybe hire yourself a photographer to get your very own Pandemic Portraits – I’m sure they’d love the work.